India is a diverse country united by many deep and powerful bonds. Unfortunately one of these is the nationwide deficit in guys who know how to flirt. Don’t believe me? Think this is a smear campaign against the honor of Indian men? Quick, just ask any girl around, “How do guys usually flirt with you?” They don’t usually need to speak. Their expression will tell you everything. It is often similar to the one they wear when they notice a particularly large cockroach.
The typical approach of our local college Casanova is something like this:
- Tell girl “You are really pretty, yaar. So cute.”
- Ask for fraandship
- Get rejected (Usually with a “Do I know you?” The nerve of these girls)
- Ask for fraandship pt.2
- Send weird TMI messages
- Get rejected pt.2
- Insult girl
- Write an FB post about how women don’t know how to value real men
- Rinse and repeat
One has to wonder, what didn’t the woman like about this smooth as butter approach? Was it the slightly scary neediness? Or the deceptive request for a fraandship? Obviously, it couldn’t be the fact that our boys don’t know how to take rejection well.
Anyways, let’s look forward to how all of us brothers can up our flirting game as a whole. Here are a few tips in that regard:
Subtlety: Okay listen close, because this is the corner stone of flirting. Never (ever) try to “confess” your feelings to her. That’s clumsy, kind of sad, definitely not sexy, and something that many girls have to deal with more than they want.
Instead, be subtle. Drop a few hints and make her wonder. Does this seem like an odd approach to you? That’s because there is a fundamental truth to flirting that you need to understand: it’s a game. That’s all it is. When you go up to a girl and flirt with her first, what you are asking is “Wanna play?”
This is a way more relaxed approach then cringing before her and hoping she’ll show you some interest. And believe it or not, girls like this approach. Because they know that it’s a game, and if you treat it as such, you’d be surprised by how many girls are willing to play. This is a nice segue to our second tip.
Playfulness: It seems these days we guys are full of dil and poetry. Listen, if a girl wants to feel sentimental she’ll watch Grey’s Anatomy. She definitely won’t be reading your 250 words Whatsapp message about how she is so different and can bring out all the softness in you.
Once again, guys, please, this is a game. Learn to have fun with it. Don’t approach every girl with the hope that this one is your “wifey.” Instead use humour, tease her, and keep things light. You want the girl to associate you with fun, not whining.
No means no (and that’s okay): All right. Get this in your head. If a girl is not interested, she – is-not-int-er-es-ted. You are not Shah Rukh khan, bro. Even Shah Rukh Khan isn’t Shah Rukh Khan. Stalking girls and harassing them isn’t sexy, and more importantly, it isn’t respectful.
This is where playfulness is so important. Sounds weird? Let me explain. If you go into a conversation with a playful mindset and get shut down, you are more likely to brush it off. However, if you get shutdown while you are completely invested in the girl and her validation, you are likely to not take it that well. Relax.
You will notice confidence isn’t listed as one of the tips. That’s because it’s as cliche as your romantic messages. You absolutely do need confidence. But you need something that gives you confidence, it doesn’t come out of thin air. And you are a lot more likely to be confident if you actually know what you are doing and keep a relaxed mindset. Remember subtlety, playfulness, and of course, respect. Follow these guidelines and you’ll soon have ’em giggling like schoolgirls in front of their crushes. Go out into the world, brothers, and make those girls swoon.